We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
