he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
People with herpes should wear stickers.
In America we eat man semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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