At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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