is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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