? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
