Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
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