This girl is more easily done than said...
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize