i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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