how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Just invented taco cereal.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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