They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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