one might say we're banned from that church
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
