You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
