I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
