I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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