now i know why i became what i already was.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
