Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(913): View more from Kansas

I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?

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(210): View more from Texas

this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!

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(256): View more from Alabama

he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.

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27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
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(910): View more from North Carolina

He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.

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(623): View more from Arizona

My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.

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(406): View more from Montana

Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.

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(706): View more from Georgia

We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning

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