I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
