woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
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She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
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I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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