im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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