i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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