Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
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