I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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