I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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