when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
