I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
that is very illegal...i love you.
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