I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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