You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
