I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
