I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
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I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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