How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
