Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
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My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
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There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.