Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(602): View more from Arizona

OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now

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(602): OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now http://tfl.nu/twmw

Replies (6) Good night (824) Bad night (668)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.

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(412): I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life. http://tfl.nu/mibv

Replies (8) Good night (985) Bad night (551)
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(801): View more from Utah

i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.

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(801): i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one. http://tfl.nu/ahi8

Replies (24) Good night (3949) Bad night (741)
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(913): View more from Kansas

checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.

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(913): checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad. http://tfl.nu/40qb

Replies (27) Good night (1557) Bad night (7183)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants

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(910): so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants http://tfl.nu/bero

Replies (42) Good night (592) Bad night (11911)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?

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(732): last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night? http://tfl.nu/rkjl

Replies (9) Good night (3468) Bad night (808)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.

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(304): Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record. http://tfl.nu/wo6o

Replies (17) Good night (1147) Bad night (5663)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010

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(304): Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010 http://tfl.nu/5ejl

Replies (8) Good night (1464) Bad night (2263)
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(813): View more from Florida

Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.

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(813): Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again. http://tfl.nu/0xdw

Replies (14) Good night (717) Bad night (4226)
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(817): View more from Texas

Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"

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(817): Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside" http://tfl.nu/md9m

Replies (12) Good night (6417) Bad night (1075)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.

(1-919): View more from North Carolina

Hopefully she would park on my face.

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(919): I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there. (1-919): Hopefully she would park on my face. http://tfl.nu/4722

Replies (21) Good night (6231) Bad night (895)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

My vagina supports interfraternal relations

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(215): My vagina supports interfraternal relations http://tfl.nu/ji34

Replies (9) Good night (1502) Bad night (657)
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(620): View more from Kansas

I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.

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(620): I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify. http://tfl.nu/e3b2

Replies (4) Good night (1193) Bad night (635)
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(586): View more from Michigan

I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.

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(586): I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down. http://tfl.nu/ak0v

Replies (3) Good night (923) Bad night (185)
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(727): View more from Florida

they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."

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(727): they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room." http://tfl.nu/y4b1

Replies (2) Good night (472) Bad night (169)

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