Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
