i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
