I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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