jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
