I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
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being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
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So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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