I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
did you just send me my own nude
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
