no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
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