It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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