So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
