i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
