You're completely useless in the revolution.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
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