We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Randomize
