So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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