Where is the hickey?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
