Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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