My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
