Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
if only i could text you this smell
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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