this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize