I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
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