i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
