Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Just high enough for therapy.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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